This question has been discussed for centuries; even kings, queens, and noblemen, the ones lucky enough to choose, have been known to favour the single life instead of marrying the wrong person. Lucky for us, we don’t have an entire country, the church, and the monarch’s pressure when faced with this question.

We’ve been so fortunate with how the world has evolved; topics previously not challenged are now discussed in the open. So here you have it; is it better to be single or get married to the wrong person? If you are asking this question there may be some disparities in your relationship that have caused you to take pause, to consider your position if your relationship is heading in a more serious direction, or to deeply assess who you do want to spend your life with – if anyone.

The benefits of singledom: 

Freedom and autonomy

To act autonomously means to be in “the state of being free of your own will” – something all crave for even if it isn’t openly admitted or sometimes even when it is not a realized want until it’s gone. The coveted bachelor’s life is the definition of free to many; it might even be written in the urban dictionary under ‘bachelor’.

Freedom means you can do what you want when you want to. Fly to Dubai without telling a soul, turn off your phone for a weekend fishing trip with the boys and not worry you’re upsetting anyone. Freedom of autonomy is empowering to say the least. You and only you control your time. Obviously, your job will have some say, but just pretend you have all the free time in the world for the sake of this point.

Spending time to identify what you really want

Taking time to identify what you want is imperative in making big decisions. It’s so easy to be swayed by others’ opinions without even adding a partner to the mix. Needing to consider someone else’s feelings and plans when working on what you want means you naturally aren’t making choices that are solely for yourself. Sadly, this means making a decision that might not actually be what you want. Being single means you have all the time you need to really dig deep and figure out what you really want and focusing your resources to setting up your dream life, ready for your dream partner.

Work on your goals

Working on goals is hard enough done alone with no distractions; having a partner or family means goals get pushed off, re-evaluated, or even completely forgotten. Being single means you’re your own boss when it comes to prioritizing and working on said goals. Having all the time you need to achieve them is incredible. There are already so many life distractions; being single means eliminating a huge one.

Focus on yourself to attract the right person

Self-work is often spoken about but isn’t always given the time necessary to be worked on in the midst of the daily grind that already exists. Going in and out of the bad relationships and trying to figure out why you seem to be attracting the same people, can be a major repercussion of not putting in self-work. Staying single gives you all the time you need to work on yourself to attract that dream girl. There is no need to settle. Be patient with yourself, focus on yourself, and all will fall into place.

An unhappy marriage results in:

Lowered morale

A drastic decrease in morale is seen when facing anything long-term in life that doesn’t make you fulfilled. This can result in less productivity and not trying your best. This is seen in jobs that are disliked, studying something you wish you hadn’t chosen, and relationships that leave you questioning the merit of their existence. You can leave a paying job even if it makes you unhappy with relative ease, but marriage is supposed to be a lifelong commitment and not something you can easily bow out of. Marrying the wrong person is like actively choosing a study topic you hate or moving to a cold country when you know you need the sun to be happy, because somehow it was an easier choice. This kind of decision will weigh on you and can be catastrophic for any morale you have left.

Emotional and mental stress

An unhappy marriage puts a significant strain on our mental health. Marrying the wrong person will run you down; it’s not uncommon to be so worn down mentally that you don’t even realize how bad it is till you’ve lost half your identity. The damage a bad marriage can put on your mental health long-term is nothing to joke about. Put yourself first because if you can’t be your best self, you are no help to anyone. There are already so many uncontrollable life factors that affect your mental well-being, choosing the wrong partner is not one of them. Why would you choose something that you know will hurt you?

Effects on your physical health

Yes, you heard correctly; marrying the wrong person can decrease your physical health. According to WebMD, couples in a bad relationship will see slower wound healing caused by a decrease in the release of pro-inflammatory proteins needed for proper recovery. Adding to that fascinating and unexpected fact, if those changes are prolonged, the increased risk of some diseases is present such as cancer, authorities, depression, and type 2 diabetes, to name a few.

Final Say

In the end, the question “Is it better to be single or get married to the wrong person?” leads to a very complex and sensitive topic; however, the answer is straightforward. Sticking with the bachelor’s life might not be for everyone long-term, but it’s definitely not something to run away from. The time to work on you and only you is now. Don’t run towards a marriage just because you feel that’s next in your plan or because people around you are doing it. Finding the right person is crucial for long-term fulfillment, and isn’t that the goal? No pressure in the universe should be able to change that decision. So go forth and when you’re ready, you’ll not only attract the perfect girl, but be setting yourself up for the life you truly want.